If Jim Harbaugh Ever Leaves Michigan, Well, I’ll be a Monkey’s Uncle

Posted by Harrison-Milo Rahajason in Pressbox Hat Trick on January 9, 2017

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I was talking college football with a guy at the bar the other night, obviously, and Jim Harbaugh’s name came up in that conversation, also obviously.

This fellow strongly believed it was only a matter of time before the polarizing Michigan head coach bolted back to the NFL. He’d be intrigued by the prospects of coaching Aaron Rodgers in Green Bay should Mike McCarthy get the boot. Or, become the head coach in Indianapolis–where he was once the starting quarterback–where he’d be reunited with his star signal caller at Stanford, Andrew Luck.

Then, this person also went on to say that Harbaugh always overstays his welcome everywhere he coaches—an opinion so platitudinous, one can wonder if any of these people who are paid to voice their opinions, have ever really followed Jim’s career at all.

Because Harbaugh overstaying his welcome everywhere would totally explain why multiple NFL front offices looking for a new head coach have reached out to gauge his interest in returning to the league in his two offseasons at Michigan, right?

Or how the race for Harbaugh after he was let go by the 49ers was such a hotly contested one, and involved multiple other NFL franchises, right?

Harbaugh has been the head coach of four different teams, and while it is true that his previous stops weren’t long, the only time he left a team for reasons other than getting a better job was when the 49ers fired him.

Since then, the 49ers have fired two head coaches, one general manager, and have registered a 7-24 record in the two seasons since his departure. Just saying.

His other two stops were at the University of San Diego, a Division Two school, and at Stanford, a prestigious Division One school. He left USD for a better job at Stanford, and left Stanford for an NFL job. He was then fired from the 49ers, seemingly without cause.

Now, at Michigan, NFL pundits are positive that he’s bound to leave college football at any moment, and return to the bright lights of the league. Why? Because he always overstays his welcome, according to the guy at the bar. Teams get tired of the guy, his antics are annoying! But also, they all totally want him to be their head coach and will happily back a Brinks truck full of cash into his driveway to get him.

Shut up, NFL people, you’re all hypocrites.

Harbaugh doesn’t need a bigger challenge right now. Winning the Big Ten Conference—a task that can only be accomplished by getting through Ohio State, Michigan State and Penn State—is plenty.

Harbaugh would also love to win a national championship at Michigan, which means getting through the Death Star known as the Alabama Crimson Tide. Additionally, he has to go against all those teams, and others, to get top recruits to Michigan. That has gone well, so far, and will eventually get even better.

A conversation I recently had with former Link editor Julian McKenzie made me realize this: Harbaugh can find no bigger challenge than the one he has right now as head coach at the University of Michigan.

Also, Harbaugh’s parents moved from sunny south Florida to freezing cold Michigan in a house next door to his. They could have moved to Baltimore to live closer to their eldest son, John Harbaugh, who served as head coach for the Ravens. They chose to move to Ann Arbor, Michigan, where their father Jack Harbaugh was once an assistant under legendary Michigan coach, and Jim’s mentor, Bo Schembechler.

The street they live on? The same street Bo Schembechler once did.

That may not be the ultimate proof of Jim’s long term stay at Michigan, but it proves that for him and his family, the University of Michigan is about more than just football. On the football side of things, though, Michigan still presents the greatest challenge he could find. He has full control of the football program, and is practically a god to the Wolverine faithful.

So yeah, I’m ready to say it: if Jim Harbaugh doesn’t retire from coaching as the head coach of Michigan, I’ll start a police car chase and I’ll be a monkey’s uncle.