Science Sometimes Sucks

graphic by joshua barkman

I know you’re all concerned, as I’ve heard the lamentations and received the singing telegrams, but I figure you all deserve an explanation: I’ve been gone because I’ve been sick, and that bitch of a mistress called science hasn’t done shit to help me.

We can transmit insane amounts of data almost instantaneously around the world. We can screw with the very atomic foundations of life.

We can make toothpaste taste like bubble gum. But when it comes to treating vertigo—a chronic dizziness caused by inner-ear problems—our best researchers have come up with this: “Move your head this way.

Ok, now that way. Feel better? No? Umm… oh. Crap. Good luck with that, I guess.”

Seriously science, I like you, but sometimes, you’re a bit of a dick.