The Tea Party

OpinionsMelissa Fuller — Published November 8, 2011

So, what’s the deal with teabagging? I mean, I thought I knew what it meant, but now I’m not so sure. Is it something people actually do? — Tea Time

There are a few different definitions floating around and, although I never call it “teabagging” myself, whenever people use the term I assume it includes licking or sucking a male partner’s balls, placing them in the mouth or on the face depending on how you define it or like to do it.

Teabagging happens more commonly for sexual pleasure or, unfortunately, as a popular prank to an unsuspecting drunk/sleeping person. I don’t really get the humour in the prank version, but then again, I generally don’t understand most things 14-year-old boys find funny.

Since the prank is pretty self-explanatory, I’m not going to talk more about it and focus instead on the consensual act of teabagging, aka “givin’ the boys some love.”

So, yes, it’s something some people actually do. Like with any other sexual act, some people love giving it and receiving it, some people hate it, and you never really know until you give it a try.

For the receiving partner, the scrotum is packed with nerve endings that I’m told can make it feel really awesome. The easiest way for both partners to try this for the first time is during oral sex in whatever position.

Starting by giving the balls attention with your hands can be a good way to lead into it, since it will help give you an idea of sensitivity, enjoyment and make it a little less intimidating the first time around.

From there you can try licking, sucking, taking your partner’s balls in your mouth, pretty much anything. You can also alternate between your mouth and hand to gently massage during oral sex.

It’s good to keep in mind that the same nerve endings that can make it great can also make it too sensitive for some guys, which is one reason some may not enjoy it. I think that this is all in communication between partners and how things are handled once down there.

I’ve also heard some people say that they feel it’s demeaning to take their partner’s balls in their mouth, but it’s my belief that sex acts are only demeaning if someone involved isn’t consenting or enjoying what’s happening.

It can also depend on how the act is performed, because for some people this comes down to power dynamics and mutual respect. It’s easy to assume that the partner taking the balls in their mouth is “letting it happen,” but I think that both partners can take on an active role and it’s all about how it’s done.

This is why I recommend it during oral sex with the receiving partner either lying down or standing up, as this gives both partners more control over the situation.

So while “teabagging” isn’t the best name, and teenage boys may have hijacked the meaning of it, the actual act isn’t really that odd. In fact, it’s a pretty common part of oral sex and many people enjoy both giving and receiving it. It may not be for you, and that’s your own choice, but I hope I was at least able to demystify it!

—Melissa Fuller

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