The Worst of Humanity (aka Being Fit and Productive)

Graphic Joshua Barkman

After waking up in a POP Montreal-fueled daze/four-day hangover, I was less than pleased this past Sunday morning.

Many things tend to peeve me in the pre-noon hours—including, but not limited to, lack of accessibility to decent coffee, having to stand when I’m on the bus and people being productive when I am not. Combine all three and it’s a surefire way to catch me at my worst.

So why the hell were there (what looked to me like) a billion people infringing on my 24 Sherbrooke bus territory who had just finished a marathon. On. A Sunday. Morning.

I don’t even think I brushed my hair before leaving my apartment, and you motherfuckers ran a marathon?

Go to hell, and take your stupid medals and your stupid Oasis juice swag packs with you, because not one of you spandexclad assholes offered me a juice box while selfishly taking all of the seats on the bus.