Looking for love
I would like a date with a fantastic girl. If you are a fantastic girl, and if you think you could use a date, read on!
First of all, you may be wondering why I am having this published in The Link. Why not use one of those matchmaking websites instead? Have I no shame? Correct! None whatsoever.
Have I no desire to join the hordes of guys posting pictures of their six-packs on dating websites? Correct! None whatsoever.
Moreover, anyone who reads The Link —or who reads at all, for that matter—starts off with a bonus point in my book.
Please don’t get the wrong impression: I have no trouble getting dates. I’m funny, smart, confident, affectionate and good-looking. But the probability of accidentally meeting a girl as awesome as the one I’m looking for is very slim–I know this because I’m a mathematician.
Here is a short list of things that I like: science, art, drinking too much coffee all at once, music, riding bikes, learning, making friends, Le Devoir , avocados, sci-fi, reddit, cohomology groups of manifolds, taking over the world, making out, sleeping in, the BBC, camping, Bertrand Russell, prime numbers and Carl Sagan.
Of course, this list is far from exhaustive. I should also point out that what I like doesn’t determine who I am; I’m only including this list because it is otherwise quite difficult to capture the pure essence of being on paper.
If Aristotle were to write this letter, I’m sure he’d proceed in a similar fashion. But then again, Aristotle would probably not write this letter because of the 400-word limit. Also because he is dead.
So if you’re as awesome as you think I require, and happen to be emotionally stable, cute and funny, send me an email! I will write back, I promise.
Feel free to include a poor quality webcam shot of yourself holding this letter while thinking, “Why the hell am I doing this?,” so that I know you are real.
My email is email@example.com
— Bruno Joyal
BSc Mathematics, McGill University
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