Nah’msayin?

The Cycle of Life

Graphic Shoshana Eidelman

If you don’t think that the 30-second commute from the EV Building to the Hall Building is a dangerous one, let me tell you something: you’re wrong.

It’s really only a matter of time before someone bites the big one at the intersection of Mackay St. and de Maisonneuve Blvd.

Of course, if you’re oblivious to the hazards of crossing this zone, let’s be honest—it’s probably because you’re cause of the danger yourself.

You see, pedestrians seem to have forgotten the very basic rule that everyone’s parents taught them when they first learned how to stand on their own two feet—you always, always have to look both ways before crossing the street.

The real problem here is that some people seem to think they are above this longstanding rule. These self-proclaimed traffic geniuses will argue that following this tried-and-true maxim is not always necessary.

“Why would you look the other way?” they’ll snottily demand. “De Maisonneuve is a one-way street. Duh.”

Fair point, traffic geniuses. But cars aren’t the only speeding vehicles you need to look out for, and that’s a fact these asphalt Einsteins will soon realize as they journey across the street—only to find themselves yelling, “Fucking cyclists!” as they scramble for sidewalk safety, having narrowly avoided getting a bike-chain makeover with a side of grease.

Listen: just look both ways. I’m telling you. That’s all you need to avoid finding out firsthand what a Montreal emergency room is like.